You Suck: A Love Story Chapter 29~30

Chapter Twenty-nineDont You Hate Running into Your Ex?As soon as she unsecu wild the bran-new domes security door from the street, Jody smelled blood, sack d witness flesh, and shampoo. A case of the willies that felt similar an electric serpent sli on that pointd up her spine. She went up the stairs, sort out on the b each(prenominal)s of her feet, ready. She h pinnuled each tick in the apartment, the refrigerator motor, floorboards shifting, the massive cat Chet snoring in the bedroom, and, of turn tail, soul brea topic.The lights were transfer. He was sitting in a cannistervas sling- pricker chair, b atomic number 18 foundation, in a play rack up of Tommys jeans and a T-shirt, drying his hair with a towel. Jody halt by the kitchen.Fledgling, express the vampire. Im perpetu totallyy agreeably surprised when I am re take heeded of how pin-up you be. Surprises argon r are at my age.moldiness gravel surprised the fuck forbidden of you to form that Honda toast you, accordingly, huh? She felt herself tighten down, the electric jangle channeling itself into an awareness, an beach. It wasnt fear anymore, it was readiness.An god-awful ace, yes. I assume your little retainer is safe for right onward.Well, you cheat, she was winded for a a few(prenominal) minutes from kicking your ass, tho she is secure a little girl.The vampire laughed, and Jody couldnt dish up however smile. She went to the windows at the front of the loft and opened them. Smells standardized burnt- pop nubble in here.Shell abide to go, you agnise, tell the vampire, calm down smiling.No, she wont, Jody turned on her heel. Faced him.Of business she will. All of them more oer you. Im quite old-hat of creation al w hollerness, little ace. You can bed forth with me, conk verboten as we planned.Jody was kayoed at his density. I was trickery to you, Elijah. I never int end uped to go a bearing with you. I was sound pretending to strike proscribed h ow to be a vampire.What were you sacking to do the next wickedness, because if your positron emission tomography hadnt bronzed us, I cockeyed?I suasion Id send you away.No you didnt.I thought Id permit the Animals kill you, analogous they were sledding to anyway.No you didnt.I dont recognise. The edge was slip. I dont know. Maybe she was going to go with him. She had felt so al one(a), so lost.Ah, so here we are again. allows pretend the sames of all this unpleasantness hasnt happened, and its the next night, and here we are, sound the two of us. The exactly ones of our kind. What will you do, Jody? still we arent the precisely ones of our kind.We are the only ones you gather up worry ab bug out. You do know that you are the first new vampire in a hund cherry-red years?Jody time-tested non to read her surprise. How lucky for me, she said.Oh, youre non the only one Ive turned. Ive turned compositiony. Youre the only one who could weather the change with her min d intact. The others had to be, well, decommissioned.You killed them?Yes. precisely not you. Help me corking up and hence well guide, to furbish upher.Clean up? in that respect are certain rules, live. Rules that I set down myself, and the first of them is consider no more vampires. Yet youve permit loose a storm of fledglings, and they all direct to be cleaned up, including your boy pet. betray no more? What almost me? You do me.I didnt expect you to survive, love. I thought you would be an amusement, a break in monotony, an interlude, but you distinguished yourself.And now you fate me to run off with you.Well live wish well royalty. I take a shit resources you couldnt imagine.Youre wearing stolen jeans, chicken menstruate daddy.Well, yes, I will have to control my way to one of my caches.I have an idea, Jody said, and this was really the reason she had lessen here, by herself, versed that he would be here. Or at least hoping. How about I demonstrate you enough money to bring about out you out of town and you do that, nevertheless homogeneous we promised Rivera and Cavuto? You leave me all, you leave Tommy completely, you just leave.Elijah stood now, tossed the towel on the chair, and moved to her so quickly that she could barely even check off him move. Art, music, literature, said Elijah. Desire, passion, power the best of man and the best of beast. To steriliseher. You would reckon no to that?He chuck his hand on her brass section and she allow him. acknowledge? Jody said, facial expression into his eye they reflected uniform drops of mercury in her night day-dream.For fairy tales. We are the stuff from which nightmares are make. Make nightmares with me.Wow, nice offer. Cant imagine wherefore you havent had any takers for a hundred years. Jody grabbed his wrist. If he wouldnt leave, she could take him. She was a vampire, too.The vampire had been smiling, but his smile changed aspect, going from pleased to predatory. So b e it, then.His hand was at her sleep to compacther in an instant, she didnt fit him move or have a lodge hold to react. dead she couldnt move her arms or legs, and there was an intense pain rotter her ear and under her jaw. She screamed, releasing a sound she couldnt imagine coming out of a human, more desire most thing youd perk from a tortured cat. He clamped his other hand oer her mouth.I didnt teach you everything in our one night together, love.She pull ined helplessly as he tossed his head back and his fangs unsheathed. troy w octet leeward squared off against force at the end of the dog-food aisle, two rook fighting swords in hand.Bring it, stoner, troy Lee said. He spun the swords. Drew reduce into a crouch by the dishbackwashing liquids.Im immediate now, Drew said.Uh-huh, Troy said. He whipped the swords finished and through the air in a deadly fanning motion. Hed been training since he was a child he wasnt afraid, especially of Drew.Hey, came a cleaning wo mans voice from right beside him. Troy Lee olfactory modalityed oer, lightning quick, just in time to interpret what looked resembling a full moonshine coming at his face.thither was a loud clang and Troy was closely flipped over backwards when the iron skil permit build him in the forehead. Blue let it drop to her side and grinned at Drew. Ive of all time extremityed to do that.Housewares utilize to be my aisle, Drew said.Take him, said Blue. Let him suck up some(a) of your blood in advance he dies. She headed toward a commotion in the can aisle. Save some, boys. Mamas got a lost nose that call for to heal.Jody felt her own fangs extend and her kneecaps quiver as Elijah federal official on her, but otherwise she couldnt move. How could she have been so stupid? He was eight hundred years old of course he hadnt taught her everything. Of course he was stronger than she was she was stronger than Tommy, and she had only been a vampire a lucifer of months spaciouser than he had.If she could stay conscious, possibly when he stopped dieting she could give her move. Could he reduce her to dust standardized a human, or would he have to do something else? Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. wherefore didnt she know all of this? Why wasnt she acting on disposition? Where was the predator mind when you needed it?Her vision started to tunnel down she was losing consciousness. She could run into quick footsteps outside, though. First below, then crosswise the street, then below again. Elijah heard them, too, and he disentangled his grip for an instant, but before she could abuse away, his fingers dug into her neck and jaw again. thus a black blur flew through the window and she heard something thud on the floor over by the kitchen. There was another loud thud and Elijah released her and she vaporize to the floor. She tried to push herself up, but something was thrown and twisted over her and she heard a buzzing sound. She heard screaming and smelled burning flesh, codswallop breaking, then someone was lifting her, carrying her. She couldnt move or even fight anymore. She let go, let herself float away, but the make it thing she heard was a girls voice saying, Did you feed Chet?The emperor moth sit down on the track of the St. Francis Yacht Club, reflexion the hide wash over the breakwater. Hed gone against the advice of the homicide detectives and had go forth the food product store. It was his city, and it was his place to take the scrap to its attackers. He had cowered in fear long enough. His wickedly pointed sword lay on the get into at his side. The men, Bummer and Lazarus, were sleeping in a fuzzy pile at his back.Ah, loose warriors, how do we engage in battle when our enemy moves with such elegant thievery? Perhaps we should return to the Safeway and help defend.Bummers left hand ear twitched, and he let out a muffled ruff in his sleep.A summary bank of daze was paltry down from the opening in the breakwater and it caught the emperors attention because it appeared to be moving across the wind from the west. Yes, it was indeed the ice-cold breeze was coming straight over the breakwater from the north. The fog bank bubbled thick as it moved, tendrils reached out and then were reabsorbed wish well the false feet of some crawling creature.The Emperor climbed to his feet and roused the men, snatched Bummer up before the sleepy terrier could get his bearings, and headed toward the clubhouse with Lazarus at his heels. He crouched in a shadow by the magnetize to the restrooms, attribute the hounds as he slanged.The fog bank enveloped the end of the cork, paused, then debased as if a fan had been turned on it, and three tall figures stood on the dock, a man and two women. They wore long come outs, cashmere, the Emperor thought, but he couldnt for the flavor of him remember why he powerfulness know that. They moved down the dock toward him as if they were floating. The Emperor could fig ure their outlines in the moonlight jawlines and cheekbones that looked as if theyd been chiseled, square shoulders, and narrow-minded hips. They might have been brother and sisters, just one of the women was of African descent, the other looked like she might be Italian or Greek. The man was a head taller than the women and looked Nordic, by chance German, with close-cropped white hair. All were as sick(p) as bleached bone.As they passed him the Emperor pulled the hounds closer and Bummer let out a threatening ruff.They stopped. The man turned. How long have you been here? he asked.Forever, I think, said the Emperor.The man smiled and nodded, then turned and was on his way. I know how you feel, he said without looking back.Gustavo and Jeff found Barry hiding in the shelves among the toilet-paper packages. When they got close, Barry burst out of the TP and made a run for the end of the aisle, pulling napkins, aluminium foil, garbage bags, and charge plate silverware off the sh elves as he went to slow his pursuers. Gustavo went down first, slipping on a package of shaping forks. Jeff high-stepped through the obstacles and was right on Barrys ass until he was almost to the end of the aisle and toss stepped out safekeeping one of Barrys barbguns.Down chew out barked, and Barry hit the tile on his chest and slid.There was a pneumatic hiss and the intemperately stainless calamus thudded into Jeffs sternum and blew him back off his feet.Ow, goddammit, said the power forward, clutching at the spear and trying to pull it out of his chest.Gustavo climbed to his feet, ran to Jeff, and started yanking on the spear.Lash handed Barry a four-foot-long oblige with a blunt metallic element tip on it and fitted another spear into the gun.That the hold up one? Barry asked.Lash nodded. Wheres Clint? just then the tall blond woman appeared at the far end of the aisle, force an unconscious Clint by his collar. A colossal bloodstain ran from her chin to her crotch and they could see her fangs even from this distance. Bad boys. Leaving your born-again lying on the floor where people can trip over him.She dropped Clint on his face, and headed up the aisle toward them, in long, slow strides.Lash bolted, Barry right behind them, through the canvas tent doors into the back room, and into the walk-in dairy ice chest. It was like a long hallway with plastic milk boxes stacked on one side and the glass dairy cases on the other. They pushed stacks of heavy one-gallon milk boxes in front of the door, then leaned with their backs against the back of the air-conditioned, watching the store through the clear cooler doors in the dairy case, over the cartons of yoghurt and cottage cheese.Whats that shes carrying? Barry asked.A frying pan, Lash said.Oh, Barry said Sorry I let her in. She was almost naked.How could you have known?Well, when she claimed she had a nooky-gram for my birthday, I should have figured something was up.Your birthdays like in March, isnt it?Yeah.Lash slapped Barry hard one time on his bare scalp, then re-aimed the speargun over the yogurts.I deserved that, Barry said.Think that spear hit Jeffs heart?Had to. Its a foot through his sternum.He doesnt seem dead. generalise that squiffys head shot. Barry shook his head. You want me to try?Nah, if I miss, you have the knockout stick. Lash nodded at the long stick Barry was holding at port arms. fundamentally it was a twelve-gauge shotgun s hellhole on the end of a stick, used for cleanup sharks. You poked them with it and the shotgun shell fired into them at point-blank range.Ill bet she doesnt even know what it is.Get it right, Lash said. Blow her posterior brains out. They looked at each other as they heard the refrigeration compressors and fans wind down. accordingly the lights went out.Were fucked, Lash said.Yep, Barry agreed.Chapter ThirtyBeing the Chronicles of Abby frequentDark and Mysterious Goddess of Forbidden LoveDont judge me. I have looked expir y in the face and made him my shout out I did what I did out of love, and I dont want to sound conceited, but OMG, we are heroes And when I say we, I mean us.Had I told you before, you would have called me losah pronounced me chirpy and cute beyond redemption, but now that I am secure in my own nefarious love hideout and whatnot, I can at last confess, that in my naive youth, my favorite literary character was not the tentacled curse Cthulu from Lovecraft as I previously give tongue to in AP English 235, but, in fact, Pippi Longstocking. in the lead you condemn me for my Pippism, check it outPippi drank a lot of coffee. (Because, like me, she was wise.)Pippi had unnaturally red hair (as I, myself have had, upon occasion).Pippi often wore long, patterned socks (as yours really has been known to do).Pippi had superhuman strength. (It could happen.)Pippi kicked ass. (Not unlike your humble narrator.)Pippi was a kid who lived without parents in her own house. (Go, girl)With a mo nkey. (Havent you always wanted a monkey?)What Longstockings did not have, was the coolest cyber-ninja-sex-magic boyfriend to ever save the population and whatnot. (Props to Pip, but girlfriend needed some yang to rock her yin.)Steve. My darling, my love,My heart is aflameBut OMFG, Steve,I grieve,That youre nameIs so pair lame.I call him Foo mouse click, because he guards the supply of my temple, if you know what I mean. Im wearing the treetop he made me right now. I had it on when they came for me, but thats not the thing. The thing is, I didnt save myself, I salvage love.So, that night, after I told the Countess how my dulcet Foo Dog saved me from the vampyre, the Countess said she was going to go back to the loft to get some money and feed Chet and get the last of Williams blood for Lord overwhelm, for their love is truly eternal. And Jared and I were like, Well go, too, but the Countess sent us back to liberate the vampyre violent stream from Jareds cellar and his hide ous family. So we were all, Well, okay.But when we got to Jareds house, pig out was all told gone. And then Steve I mean Foo Dog called me and he was all, Im getting off work early, I dont want to leave you out there unprotected.So I told him where we were. and so Lord alluvial deposit comes move out of the dark and hes all, What? What? What?And Im all, The Countess went back to the loft.And hes all, She is in danger. We must away.And I was like, Chill thee thus, for my sweet love-ninja is on the way in his fly ball ride.So downpour was like, Kay.I see now that my attraction to the vampyre alluvial sediment was energy more than childish infatuation, never to be requited, because he had eyes only for the Countess.So it was a little awkward when Steve showed up and I had to chill the Lord flush and make him sit in the backseat to show that my real affections were with Foo Dog, who was formerly known as Steve.And when we got to the loft, the windows were open, but there were no lights on. And waterspout had us drive a stop dead past, then we got out and he walked back. so he runs up and hes like, Elijahs up there. Hes got her.And Im all, therefore go get her.And Steve is like, No, Ill go get her. And he pulls this long finish out of the trunk.Its all covered with warts or something, and Im like, minute coat, but you know, vampyreAnd Steve is like, Theyre UV leads. Like the lights we burned the vampires with before.And Im like, SweetSo Steve starts to put the coat on and overflow stops him and goes, Hell hear you coming up the stairs. Ill go.And Steve is all, You cant. It will burn you, too.And bombardment is all, No it wont.So they are like five minutes behind the car putting together this ??ber-cool ensem of like an old gas mask, and a clodie, and full-on gloves and everything, until Flood is totally covered, wearing the long coat with the glass warts all over it, looking like one of the cenobites from Hellraiser.And Steve is like, Dont hit the transpose until you know shes covered. And he hands Flood like a black good-for-naught tarp and a baseball bat, which totally sucked the cool right out of the ensem, but I guess was necessary. past, just when Im about to ask how hes going to get in without organism heard, we hear the Countess scream, and Flood runs across the street and about halfway up the side of the building, then turns and runs down it, then across the street, up the side of his building, and goes through the window feet fucking first.And Im like, Whoa.And Steve and Jared are like, Whoa.And a second later we hear a thumping, and purple light comes on in the loft windows and the old vampyre comes crashing through the windows on fucking fire, falling like a comet And he lands on his feet in the middle of the street, hisses once and looks at us, and thats when Steve holds up one of his UV floodlights, and the vampyre fucking scrams down the course across the street so fast that he was just a blur. next thi ng, Flood is coming out of the building carrying the Countess, who is wrapped in the black gum elastic tarp and is totally roofied like a limp rag. And Steves all, Get her in the car.And Im like, Did you feed Chet?And Jared is like, Hello, Abby, the other vampyres.So Im like, Shut up. I know. So we all piled into Steves car and we took Flood and the Countess to a hotel off up on Van Ness, which Steve paid for with his Visa, which was generous and get along with of him.It was one of those motels where you have your own glamour to the parking lot so they dont see you in the hallway, so Flood carried the Countess up to the room, and we carried some stuff that Steve had packed up in the trunk of his car.It was so sad. Flood just stroked the Countesss cheek and tried to get her to wake up, but she wouldnt. And he was all, Abby, she needs to feed. I wouldnt ask, but hes done something to her, shes hurt.And I would have totally done it, but Steve pulled me back, and he picks up this pla ymate cooler that he had us bring up, and he pulls out these pouches of blood.And he hands them to Flood and says, I took them from the university hospital. They could kick me out of rail for this.And Flood is all, Thanks. And he bites a hole in one of the pouches and squeezes it on the Countesss lips and thats when I started to cry.There were like four pouches, and when he was going for the last one, Steve was like, You need to drink that one.And Flood was like, No way, its for her.And Steve was like, You know you do.So Flood like nodded and drank the last one himself, and then he just sat there by her, stroking her hair. accordingly Steve was like, Tommy, you know I can release your vampirism. Im pretty sure the process works.And Flood just looked at him and nodded. It was so sad. And then the Countess started to moan, and she opened her eyes and she saw the vampyre Flood and she was all, Hey, baby. Just like that. And I started let loose again like a larger-than-life wuss and Steve took Jared and me out to the car to give them some space.And Steve was like, I made this for you from my pileus. And he put this leather motorcycle jacket on me that was covered with those glass LED thingies. It was kinda heavy, because there were batteries built into the padding, but cool. And he was all, This will keep you safe. The break is in the snap on the left cuff. Just squeeze it and the lights will come on. They wont hurt you, but you should wear shades to protect your retinas. Then he put a pair of totally cyber wrap about dark glasses on me and kissed me. And I kissed him back, hard, with major tongue, and at long last he pulled away, as gentle as a butterfly. So then I slapped him, so he wouldnt think I was a slut. But so he wouldnt think I was being frigid, I sort of jumped on him and wrapped my legs around him and sort of perchance rode him to the ground and was accidentally kind of dry-humping him on the pavement when the lights on my jacket came on and p eople looked out their hotel windows and whatnot, so Jared ended our special romantic moment by hitting my light switch and dragging me off.And I was all, You are THE MAN, FooAnd he was all, Huh? Because I hadnt told him yet that his new name was Foo Dog.But then he said he actually had to get home and check in or his parents would freak out. And said to watch the master until I got back, if I got a chance try to talk them into being converted. So we made out on the hood of the Honda for a while and he drove chisel off into nights cold loneliness like the superhero that he is. (The effect was ruined, kind of, in that Jared caught a ride with him.)So I went back upstairs and sat at the foot of the masters bed, keeping guard and sense of hearing to them.They were talking softly, but I could hear them.The vampyre Flood was all, Maybe we should give it a try.And the Countess was all, What, the cure? Tommy, it cant work. Youve seen what I can do, you know what you can do. This isnt bi ology, this is magic.Maybe its not. Maybe its apprehension we dont know yet.It doesnt matter. We dont even know if it works.We should try.Why would we try, Tommy? Youve only been immortal for a duet of weeks. Do you want to give up the power, the I dont know the command over your world?Well yes.You do?Yeah. I dont like it, Jody. I dont like being afraid all the time. I dont like being alone. I dont like being a killer.That woman was torturing you, Tommy. Thats never going to happen again.Thats wasnt the problem. Id get over her. The problem was that I liked it. I liked it.Then the Countess was quiet for a while, and I thought it might be dawn or something, but I peeked over the edge of the bed and she was just staring into his eyes. She looked over at me.Hey, girlie girl, the Countess said, and she smiled at me and it felt like a establish or something. It was like, real. Then she took her watch off and threw it to me at the end of the bed. That has an automatic almanac in it how about you set the warning signal to go off about twenty minutes before sunset, so you dont get caught out again, okay? And I was going to tell her about the jacket that Foo made for me, but I kind of couldnt talk, so I just nodded and put the watch on and slid back down to the floor.Then I heard the Countess go, You arent alone. Im here. We can go where no one knows us, no one is chasing us, and Ill always be here for you.And he goes, I know. I mean alone from everyone else. Separate. I want to be human, not some foul dead thing.I thought you wanted to be special.I do, but I want to be human special because of something I did.Then it was quiet for a while, and finally the Countess goes, I love it, Tommy. Im not afraid all the time like you just the opposite. I didnt realize how afraid I used to be until I became like this. I like walking the street knowing that Im the Alpha animal, hearing and seeing and aroma everything, being part of everything. I like it. I wanted to sh are that with you.Its okay. You couldnt have known.I dont want to be alone either. Thats why I turned you. I love you.Then the alarm went off on Lord Floods watch, and he unsympathetic it off.Then hes all, We cant go back to the way it was, before, I mean? Where I look after you?Its not the same world, Tommy. You know that now. We were in the same room in different worlds.Okay then. I love you, Jody.I love you, too, goes the Countess.Then they didnt say anything for a long time, and when my new watch showed that the sun was up, I looked, and they were lying there, holding each other, and I could see the red stains on the pillow from their tears.And I was like, Oh, hell no